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Separated man and womanDivorce doesn’t happen overnight, you have events that lead up to the decision.

But before it reaches the point of no return and you decided to say you want a divorce you go through so much.

Questioning, debating, talking to friends and family backwards and forwards trying to decide.

But as you are in an emotional turmoil, it is not the best time to make decisions and once the word divorce is mentioned to your partner, it changes so much in the relationship.  What ensues is even more pain and confusion because now you don’t have to contend with your own confusing and conflicting feelings and thoughts you have to deal with your partner’s and others effected by your decision.

Don’t mention you want a divorce until you have had a chance to sit down and look at the all your choices with someone who isn’t emotionally involved.

Divorce may seem the only way to go, but actually when you look beyond the current situation at what has triggered the breakdown you may find the relationship can be saved.

Any problems around money can be dealt with by dealing with the money mindset. But  what about love?

Do you feel you are ignored and unloved?  It could be you have gone past the stage of being “in love” and no longer in love, however that doesn’t mean you don’t love each other.  It could be you are not showing the love in the way you want to receive love.

Each person has a way of feeling loved and when you work through how you feel it can bring an opportunity to resolve the situation because feeling unloved causes problems to start piling up leading you to your present dilemma.

Divorce changes so much with all the financial and emotional implications, it is scary to say the least, regretfully the family structure is destroyed it can’t be any other way.

Step back from the brink

This is why I am suggesting you check out the financial and physical reality of divorce, even before you actually mention you want a divorce.

You will have already considered living arrangements, possible settlement options and the financial arrangements that need to be agreed, especially if children are involved.

However I am sure you will know things change regardless of what agreements are in place, there are no guarantees. So you need to look long and hard at the options you have available to you.

Which is why you need to be calm and clear headed, not in an emotional state. This is where coaching is of benefit, as it allows you to look at everything in an unemotional detached way.

Legal advice is essential

Even before you make your decision you should speak with a solicitor to ascertain your legal rights and the do’s and do nots of a divorce to ensure you do not jeopardise any settlement.

Are you ready to take action? Contact me to book a discovery 1-2-1 session