Expectations can be a blessing or a bane in your life.
As I write this I cannot help thinking of my cat Saffy a beautiful but rather large cat, she could be wonderfully slim, however in cold weather she prefers to be indoors rather than out. Consequently she gets very little exercise, only going out to do her business.
Saffy is a loving cat, she adores nothing more than cuddling up next to me on the settee, laying on her back resting her head on my leg. I melt every time she does it.
Why am I mentioning Saffy because she gave me the idea of writing about expectations?
As I mentioned Saffy is a large cat, she loves her food, but she is very fussy.
I made the mistake a few weeks ago of buying a brand of wet cat food that I hadn’t tried before. Unfortunately I had run out her of normal cat food which I can only get it at the large supermarket.
I expected the new cat food would do until I got the chance to get to the supermarket. Oh boy, I couldn’t have been more wrong!
Saffy meowed excitedly as normal as I opened the pouch and placed the contents into her dish for her. Her cries of excitement turned to a puzzled look as she smelt the food, then a look of disgust as she realised it wasn’t her usual brand.
If you own a cat, you will know they are very good at using their facial expressions to let you know what they are thinking.
Well, I should have known better I suppose, as the food was meat in jelly, whereas she is used to real meat, cooked and served in small portions with gravy.
Both of us experienced a major disappointment in our expectations, Saffy because she was expecting her usual food, me because I thought I had solved the problem of failing to have enough tins of food for her.
What are your expectations?
Take a moment to think about the above scenario, why did I expect Saffy to eat what is basically a McDonald’s when she is used to gourmet food?
Was it because I assumed that she would eat anything being a cat, that she should be grateful that I was actually feeding her meat? Probably, but I got that terribly wrong, and consequently caused myself even more problems because she was expecting her dinner and apart from dried biscuits I didn’t have anything to give her.
What expectations do you have that cause you more problems? Do you assume that you know best? And what of others expectations of you, do you know what they are likely to be?
Whilst I have used Saffy as my example, it highlights my point, that expectations can be a blessing or a bane in your life, as you set your own expectations and limitations.
However, you need to know what they are and how to manage them otherwise you could find yourself being disappointed as Saffy was by my offering her a McDonald’s instead of a gourmet dish.
Being rejected brings up so many feelings, such as guilt, embarrassment, being unworthy, or unloved so awareness of your expectations and limitations will help stop you being rejected.
I know that I wouldn’t be happy with a McDonald’s it’s not something I would eat, so why would I expect Saffy to do so?
Life isn’t all black and white if only it was! There are shades of gray as well.